Second Chances

How often do we tell ourselves: “That’s it, I’m done!” Are we acting out of pain without thinking of possible consequences? Do we want to live without the people involved and want to close the door on a relationship permanently?

It is not always easy to give second chances. There is a lingering pain, hurtful memories, and fear of starting the suffering all over again should old wounds reopen. Does this sound familiar? I have experienced those feelings, and it sometimes took considerable time to get ready to let them go and to replace them with forgiveness. But when I did, a stressful burden was lifted, and I felt better and more in peace.

One thing is sure; we can forgive in our hearts and minds and nurture the feeling that everyone deserves a second chance. Looking at painful experiences objectively, you might discover that it wasn’t just a one-way street and that we carry some of the responsibility. Consider how often you have received second, or even third chances. We all make mistakes and sometimes deserve another opportunity to do better and to try again. A second chance is an opportunity to show that we are wiser and more knowledgeable.

Second chances and forgiveness are close cousins. When we can forgive others as well as ourselves, we are ready to grant a second chance. That doesn’t mean we have to repeat the same mistakes all over again. Let’s keep in mind that we all change and the person in the past is not the person in the present. I believe we grow spiritually and can leave much of our heavy baggage behind.

If you feel you do not give or get second chances, consider this quote by Nicholas Sparks.

“Don’t think there are no second chances. Life always offers you a

We should enjoy life, and this is only possible if we are at peace within. May you enjoy a happy journey filled with love for yourself and others.

Silvia Coggin, CPF
Author and founder of

Winter Rain

It seemed that Tucson would have no rain this winter, and I was becoming concerned. Will we slide into another drought? Our temperatures had been high for the season and the plants in our yard were starting to bloom. I could feel their confusion. Is it spring or winter?

Finally, we got some of the much-anticipated winter rain, and I felt excited and happy. I stood at the window and took it all in. The gentle rain quieted my mind, and I was filled with gratitude. Closing my eyes and listening to the soothing sound of the rain brought me peace, and I saw in my mind the animals drinking this elixir from heaven and the plants absorbing the moisture and becoming rejuvenated.

My friends in Europe wouldn’t have believed that I could get so turned on by rain. But then, there was a lot of rain in Belgium, and I always felt excited when I saw sun and blue skies. Opinions and attitudes change depending on our environment and life experiences, and when there is an abundance of something, we may lose our appreciation for it. We can become complaisant when we are on cruise control and when everything unfolds well and comfortably. We can easily overlook our blessings until they are gone. Let’s look around, count our blessings, as the saying goes, and give a gratitude prayer. Nothing in life is a given, our blessings are gifts to be appreciated and cherished.

Pondering this as I watched the gentle rain, I felt gratitude for my mental journey and for the clarity it created in my mind. Everything and everyone can be a teacher, even the rain, but it requires clear vision and an open heart.

Now I look at rain with a thankful heart. And should I get wet, I just remember being the child who loved to dance in the rain.

Silvia Coggin, CPC
Author and Founder of







Happy New Year

Standing at the threshold of the New Year, I feel nostalgic and excited at the same time. I am looking forward to writing a new chapter in my book of life reflecting lessons learned and new dreams.

When you lift your glass and toast to a happy and healthy New Year, don’t forget that you want to start a fresh New Year, not one burdened with unresolved issues. Find peace within, love and forgive yourself, and then forgive the people who hurt you. You can do this in various ways. I like to relive my year, make peace, and then visualize a blank page waiting for me to begin the new chapter in my book of life. I see myself surrounded by love, compassion and empathy, and my heart is filled with the same feelings for others. My goal is to love, laugh a lot, and not to sweat the small stuff. Remember the serenity prayer:

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change
 the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference”

Reinhold Niebuhr

The beginning of a New Year can be a continuation of what is, or it can be a fresh start. Maybe your 2018 just needs a little tweaking, a commitment to change a few things to make you happier and more fulfilled. Starting a new chapter in your book of life is a great opportunity to look at yourself and the life you live. If you are satisfied and happy with what you see, then congratulate yourself on your achievement and enjoy 2018. But many of us would like to make some changes. If so, don’t procrastinate but don’t be overly ambitious. Keep in mind that any resolution you make becomes a journey. Success will come to you as long as you stay focused on your goal and believe in yourself.

Imagine your book of life with all the chapters you have lived and all the blank pages waiting for you. There is great wisdom in your book of life and much more to be added.  Always remember that only you can be the author of your book of life. Be kind, patient, and confident that it will be a great year, filled with good health, lots of joy, and happiness.

Wishing you “einen guten Rutsch ins Neue Jahr” (Happy New Year)!

Silvia Coggin, CPC
Founder and Author of


Quality of Life

Quality of life is hard to define or to describe, and I have never spent much time thinking about it.  My life has been interesting. I loved my work, traveled extensively, socialized, entertained and in a few words, did what I wanted to do, and what I thought would make me happy and bring me joy. Looking back, I can honestly say that I enjoyed a great quality of life when I was master of my ship.

But then, everything changed. It suddenly felt like I was living in a tumbling house of cards. My doctors talked to me about choosing between quality of life and length of life. I was in shock. I had the quality of life I wanted, but it was evaporating. What am I to do with my limited physical capabilities to create a new quality of life and what would that include? I was certain of one thing. It would have to be new and different, something I never thought would be the center of my daily life. Would it be possible or would I fall into a depression? I decided to find a new quality of life, and to never allow self-pity to hold me back.

So, after a lot of soul searching it all came together. I can still see my friends, just in different ways. Late-night and long dinners have been replaced by early bird dining and “happy hour” is becoming a favorite of mine. I have replaced my cherished dinner parties with invitations to cocktails and hors d’oeuvres. I realized that I can still socialize, just in different ways.  Then we got an adorable Yorkie puppy, Romeo, a true lover and a sunbeam of love in my heart. I always loved to read and now I have the time to do it. Workouts at the gym are no longer possible, but I take delight in vigorous walks. And of course, I love to write, and I stay busy with my memoires, blog and other projects.

I realized that one’s quality of life is fluid and needs to be adaptable under any circumstances. But it requires an open heart and mind to do so. I know I will have to adapt again, but as long as I can fit some of the activities I enjoy into my daily life, I know I can tell my doctor, “Yes, I still have a good and acceptable quality of life”.

Silvia Coggin, CPC
Author and Founder of


A New Year – A New Beginning

A New Year - A New BeginningThis year flew by and my resolution last year of filling my life with happy moments proved beneficial as most of 2016 was a struggle with my health and sometimes it took a lot of effort to see a happy moment in a jungle of pain and difficulties. But I persisted and things are looking up, so I will start the New Year with optimism and faith.

My resolution for 2017 is to put a highlight into every day, something that brings joy and makes me happy. I started this before the holiday season and it really works. An uplifting phone call, visit with a dear friend, a delightful meal, just a little time with myself, playing with Romeo, reading a good book, and the list goes on.

What did I learn from 2016? Being kind and patient with myself, which for a driven person like me was a big lesson to learn. And then I feel much gratitude for the love and support of my husband, the compassion of dear friends, and the dedicated care of my health team. I also became aware of what is important and what is just frills which come and go. I certainly experienced a life lesson this past year.

My wish for you is that you realize how special you are. It is so easy to forget with the busy life styles most people live, but loving yourself is the foundation for loving others. Being patient and compassionate with yourself will allow you to show the same to others. Just taking a little time for a daily meditation and going within may do wonders. Look at this New Year like a new beginning. Visualize a black board showing the year 2016 with all that happened in your life – the good and the not so good! Forgive yourself and others, and then take a sponge and erase it all. A new blackboard for the New Year, a great moment filled with much promise. Enjoy 2017 to the fullest. Make it your year and remember always that you are special.

Happy New Year!


Silvia Coggin, CPC
Author and Founder of

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